Elizabeth

Articles by Elizabeth

Elizabeth is an attorney by day, entertainment blogger by night, and a soon-to-be mom. When she's not fending off the paparazzi who think she's Tina Fey, she enjoys wine, exercises in elaborate procrastination, invoking her acerbic wit, and using words like acerbic. She's written for the entertainment sites SqueeTV, Xfinity, and Snakkle, and her posts have been featured on Wet Paint, Good Morning America, and (it is rumored) her parents' fridge. Elizabeth can be found working on her night cheese in Chicago where she lives with her husband and two beautiful DVRs.

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New On The The Juice Guide

The Bachelor—Episode 8: The One Where We Meet the Parents

by Elizabeth February 22, 2012 The Juice

It’s hometown time! You know what that means: awkward conversations about “intentions,” lots of rehashing about failed relationships and girls’ broken hearts, and laying eyes on the people who spawned Courtney. In Ocala, Florida, Lindzi lets us know that she’s only brought one man home to meet her family, and that guy ended up breaking [...]

The Bachelor – Episode 7: The One with All the Confrontations

by Elizabeth February 14, 2012 The Juice

The Silicone Express makes its way to Belize. Ben lets us know “the feelings of love are there, but he’s not ready to tell anyone yet” and he’s getting excited for hometowns. Lindzi gets the first one-on-one, causing Nicki to sob. Sigh. This is not as awesome as Emily comparing to Ben to cheesecake (in [...]

The Bachelor: Episode 6. The One Where We Get Primal

by Elizabeth February 7, 2012 The Juice

We’re off to Panama City, where the previews promise us toplessness and ugly crying. The ladies are excited, despite the fact that Ben is wearing white jorts. Kacie gets the first date—and (surprise!) a helicopter ride! They each packed three things: Kacie brought a stuffed monkey, corkscrew and candy, and Ben brought a machete (uh), [...]

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 5. The One That Burned Our Corneas

by Elizabeth January 31, 2012 The Juice

Hola from Vieques, Puerto Rico! The first solo date goes to Nicki and her fluorescent yellow nails. Nicki and Ben spend a lovely day exploring old San Juan and gawking at a local wedding. The wedding is the perfect excuse for Ben to make Nicki feel awkward by spending the rest of the date asking [...]

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 4. The One with the Fake Polygamy in Utah

by Elizabeth January 24, 2012 The Juice

Welcome rose-lovers! I’m excited to share this Bachelor journey with you on Curvy Girl Guide. We begin in Park City, Utah—on a helicopter, of course. Much to Kacie B.’s chagrin, Rachel gets the first one-on-one date with instructions to “let nature take its course.”Kacie starts having a case of the come-undones in her confessional, Anyway, [...]

The Return of The Bachelor and Other Favorites

by Elizabeth December 19, 2011 The Juice

There are few things I enjoy more on Monday nights than turning on the latest installment of the franchise that produces epic relationship failures: The Bachelor/ette. Given that I have no fantasy that there will be a happy ever after, most of the draw is the behind-the-scenes drama and counting the amount of times anyone [...]

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